Another sleepless night. It is always like this when Eros and I fight. I can’t sleep until things between us are okay. When we were younger, we fought a lot. Things were different between us then. We were immature, and life kept getting in the way. You’d think over time we would have matured, but no. We haven’t, and we still fight. Have we really changed? Have we really grown? I curl into a ball on our bed. It is so cold…so empty. I hate it.
The bedroom door opens, and I listen to the sound of his footsteps crossing the room. Eros probably doesn’t want Hedone to know that we are fighting. The least we can do is put a show on for our daughter. I sigh, turning to the other side of the bed to avoid looking at him. The bathroom door closes, and I hear the shower turn on. The silent treatment. Closing my eyes, I try to get some more sleep, but the sound of walls shattering has me sitting up. I slip out of bed and head into the bathroom as quickly as I can in my pregnant state. I knock on the bathroom door.
“E-Eros?” I call out. No answer, but the sound of crumbling tiles becomes louder. I open the door, my shoulders tensing as I watch him pound his fist against the shower walls. I rush over to him, placing my hand on his shoulder. “Eros!”
His head whips towards me as he hits the marble wall once more. “Go back to sleep.”
I look at his knuckles. Gold Ichor drips from them, and I shake my head. “You’re bleeding.”
He looks away from me, his fists dropping to his sides. “I’m fine.”
“You aren’t,” I say, grabbing his hand.
He snarls at me, yanking his hand away. Eros moves around me, grabbing his towel and wrapping it tightly around his waist. “That’s not your problem anymore.”
My shoulders drop, and I instantly start thinking the worst. He…he wants to leave me. End everything after all we have been through. “A-are we not…”
Eros sticks his hand under the sink, wincing. “We are not…what I thought we were.”
My lip trembles, and I wipe the tears from my face. “D-do you want…a divorce?”
He looks at me through the mirror. “Never.”
I nod, looking down at my hands. Space. We need space. “I’ll g-go now.”
“Once I found the letters under your pillow, I thought the worst. I gave you so many chances to tell me the truth, yet you didn’t take it. I thought we shared everything. I…I let you inside my head. You saw me at my weakest…and…” Eros takes a steadying breath. “I have to get ready for work.”
I dig my nails into my palms. “I-I didn’t want you to worry. You have been so anxious with the twins coming…”
Eros moves around me, heading to the closet. “Because this was so much better for me.”
I follow behind him. “I was going to tell you.”
“When? Hm? After you were kidnapped?” he hisses, yanking off his suit from a hanger. He drops his towel on the ground, and I quickly look away. Even though I have seen him naked countless times, I still get flustered, and right now, I need a clear head.
“He wasn’t going to kidnap me.”
Eros snarls again. “Do you know why I’m so paranoid about our kids? Did you even bother to guess? Because I know how much any one of our millions of enemies would pay to get their hands on them.”
My shoulders tense, anger bubbling inside me. “I am not the one who has millions of enemies!”
“You can’t be that naïve! You’re the daughter of the King! His enemies are your enemies!” he shouts.
I scoff, crossing my arms over my chest. I turn back to look at him. “I haven’t had an issue for centuries!”
Eros yanks his coat off the hanger, putting it on, and then wrapping his tie around his neck. “Did it not cross your mind what your grandfather would do to them? Or Chronos? I have to think about it! I have to imagine every fucking possible way my children could be taken from me! Again!”
His breathing is out of control, his chest rising and falling quickly. He grabs his shoes, putting them on roughly. “I’m late for work.”
I grab his arm. “We won’t lose them!”
He pulls himself away from me. “Not only that, you lied to me!” He turns to look at me, his eyes glowing. “You! We’re supposed to share everything! Yet you hid this from me? You have attacks that leave you paralyzed, and you didn’t tell me? Don’t you see how wrong this is?”
I chew my bottom lip. “I’m sorry!”
His eyes shimmer, slowly shifting to silver. “No, you’re not.”
Eros spins on his heel, exiting our bedroom and leaving me to my thoughts. I need…I need to lie down. The lights in the closet flicker as the twins shift in my stomach. I slowly make my way to the bed, curling into a ball. Nothing is going to be the same again…
The entire day is spent in silence in the bedroom. I leave to make Hedone her breakfast, but I find a note when I come out to prepare her lunch, telling us she is out with Margaux, Thea’s younger sister. The two of them have become fast friends and Margaux is turning our daughter into a little rebel. She really is like her father. At least she lets us know who she is with. Eros doesn’t make it home for dinner at all, but I leave him and the girls their meals for when they get home. After eating I make my way to the bedroom to spend the rest of the night alone.
My stomach grumbles after a few hours of staring at the wall. The twins have been going through my meals like a velociraptor through a pack of monkeys. I shudder, Eros’s dinosaur theory is rubbing off on me. I swing my legs over the bed, heading to grab some food.
I step into the kitchen and stop in my tracks. Eros is home, holding the kale salad I left for him in his hand. I turn away from him, scuffing my feet on the floor. He wouldn’t want to see me right now.
“Thank you for dinner,” he says.
I stop walking, closing my eyes. “I…I really am sorry.”
He sighs. “I thought we shared everything.”
“W-we do. Our lives have been so busy…” I stop myself, not wanting to lie to him accidentally.
“Why didn’t you tell me about the meeting?” he asks, his breathing uneven.
I sigh, walking into the kitchen. “You’ve been so stressed and busy with work. I didn’t want to add any more to it.”
He laughs shakily. “Wrong answer, care to try again?”
“I-I thought I could do it on my own…” I mumble.
“Do what on your own?”
“Handle the situation…”
“Nope. Try again.”
I scrunch my nose, thinking. “What do you want me to say?”
Eros looks me up and down. “I want you to realize that you’re trying to change the past. You think you weren’t strong enough, and we lost our daughter.”
I open and close my mouth a few times, looking at him. I…I didn’t realize. Is that really what I am trying to do? Prove that I am strong enough now to protect our unborn children? I look away from him, staying silent.
“I’d rather live in the present, where I have a gorgeous wife who can’t keep her hands off me, a brother who tolerates me, a daughter who rebels, and two kids on the way.” He sighs, stepping around me. “That’s the world I want to live in. If you want to do the same, let me know.”
He leaves me alone in the kitchen, and I sigh. Will our relationship ever heal?
- Forgotten Gods: Broken Glass - June 30, 2021
- Forgotten Gods: Something’s Not Right - June 13, 2021
- Forgotten Gods: The Heist - May 21, 2021