Movement from the corner of my eye caught my attention. I glanced over my shoulder to find Love restrained by Jealousy and Hatred. Their expressions were of sorrow and pity. Love scowled at me, prideful of his final act of defiance.
I remembered everything. I relived my life from the time I was young to the point I decided to leave home. A flash of unusual events smeared across the inside of my skull. Things I don’t remember living or hearing. They were conversations with family members I’d tried to forget, along with conversations with the detective. The images were blurry and the sounds muffled, but they were shadows of experiences I didn’t realize I’d had. The more I attempted to focus on them, the worse the visions became.
I growled angrily, stomping away from him. I was done with the conversation, and it was time to get back to Sam. I didn’t know if she was hurt, scared, or worse. I needed to get back to her so I could catch myself up on the things I missed and do my best to explain the new developments in my mind.
His face twitched as he glared at me. I held his stare for a moment, watching something shift in his eyes. It was as if something washed over him or a veil of some sort was lifted. His eyes sparkled as he took a long drag from his cigarette.
I awoke to the sound of metal clanking together. My eyelids felt heavy, and it was a chore for me to open them. There was a dull light flickering overhead. I turned my head, rolling my eyes around as I attempted to force my blurry vision into clarity.
“It’s not important why,” I snarled. “That’s not what created my issues. What created these manifestations was the isolation I felt when I couldn’t live up to the expectations laid out by my father. They were impossible notions to live up to, and even though I thought I exceeded them, I never scratched the surface in his eyes.”
She cared about me as I did for her. I trusted her, and I wanted her to help me. I wasn’t going to admit it to her, but I needed to admit my issue to myself, so I could attempt to reclaim my true self before I split.
I’m not going to just give you the ending without allowing you to take the journey. The fact is that you’re broken, Dinlas. This whole journey you’ve taken away from the family, isolating yourself, has shattered you more than you could imagine.
My eyes darted around the room, scanning every corner to see if there was any sign of my minions. There was nothing. The newfound love character was nowhere to be seen. That didn’t mean he wouldn’t make an appearance at some point, but I felt it was best to let the sleeping emotion rest.
When you became so angry and frustrated at your family, your psyche imploded like a very powerful bomb. The blast scattered all of your emotions, including me, to all parts of your mind. The only two that emerged from that carnage were Jealousy and Hatred. You clung to them so tightly in your desperate need to feel capable that you fed them all of your attention.
She looked up at me, her gaze locked with mine, disbelief in the depths of her eyes. She clung to me, pressed so tightly against my body it was as if we were joined at the hip. I didn’t want to admit what I felt for her, but I couldn’t fight it any longer. I loved her, and I would do anything for her.
Realizing the two minions I’d had my entire life were gone, left me with an undefinable emptiness. Many new emotions swirled within me, tugging and pulling me in ways I didn’t think were possible. All I ever knew was hate, anger, and jealousy for everything around me. The unknown made me fearful of the next step. I was alone inside, but I had the detective on the outside.
“Leave,” I replied. “I don’t need either of you anymore. What I feel coursing through my body has opened my eyes to what was holding me back. It was the pair of you. I don’t have a desire to feel hate, rage, or jealousy. I have the only thing I’ve ever desired.”
I turned to scowl at her. “I’m sick of the way you talk to me,” I snarled. “You speak to me like I’m as insignificant as the mortals you despise so much. I am Dinlas, your God, and I don’t answer to either of you.